So, I’m at the age (and have been for a while) where everyone has been asking me what my plans are after I graduate. By “plans,” they mean which colleges I’ve applied to.

When I tell them I’m not planning on going to college, they usually have one of two responses. One, they’re totally shocked that anyone would undertake such an endeavor. Two, and more commonly, they give me the old skeptical “You think that, but you’re young, and you’re gonna regret it” look and lecture.

I’m sick of it. I’ve been dodging college questions since I was fourteen. People have been hounding me at family reunions, church, school, etc. “Don’t waste your potential; you’re so smart!” “You’ll regret it later!” “College is so much fun, though!” (News flash: I wouldn’t go to college to have fun — I might try to take a class or something)

My argument that it’s too expensive and I want to avoid debt is shrugged off. My point that the colleges in my area are dens of dissolution, depravity, etc. is negated. When I say I just don’t want to, people just ignore that and continue with their rant.

All that to say, I came up with a fake answer to the college question, so that I could avoid offending any more people. I told everyone that I was planning on going to Antarctica to help the penguins there (because they need love, too). Most people just rolled their eyes, but accepted it, and since I have circumvented many conversations about my plans after high school.

Then, since Charlie Puth’s “Attention” has been stuck in my head, and since “penguin” kind of rhymes with “attention,” I wrote this parody.

(Note: if you haven’t heard the song, you can still enjoy my *amazing* lyrics 😉 If you want to hear it, I recommend the original, and Peter Hollens’ + Mike Tompkin’s cover of it)


Verse 1) I’ve been runnin’ ‘round, runnin’ ‘round, runnin’ ‘round, dodging the people who mean well,

Cause I know that they, know that they, know that they want to talk.

I’m so tired of, tired of, tired of all the colleges they sell,

The degrees and jobs, ends and odds that they think I want.

Prechorus) I know that input’s helpful,

But I’m upset.

You’re getting all your dreams mixed up with mine.

And when I talk, I’m careful:

No disrespect,

But I don’t want your help when I decide.

Chorus) I’m gonna help the penguins,

But that’s not really true.

Maybe I just hate the thought of going back to school.

I’m gonna help the penguins,

At least that’s my excuse.

I’m just making sure that I’ll stop arguing with you.

V 2) I’ve been studyin’, studyin’, studyin’, and I’m learning all the time;

I’m not missin’ out, missin’ out, missin’ out on my fun.

Got no compromise, compromise, compromise, on my conscience or my mind:

I already know, ‘ready know, ‘ready know that I’ve won.

Prechorus) I know degrees are common,

And so is debt.

I’m living life just fine right here at home.

And I’m not eating Ramen –

Show some respect.

I’m doing better than most do on their own.

Chorus) I’m gonna help the penguins,

But not ‘cause I’m not smart.

It’s not that I hate learning, or I’m poor, or that I’ve slacked.

I’m gonna help the penguins,

I knew from the start

I wanna keep my wallet, soul, and body all intact.

Bridge/Backup) Why are you askin’ me?

Why do you wanna know (huh)?

Why are you askin’ me?

Why do you wanna know (oh)?

Prechorus) I know you don’t believe me,

You think I’m wrong:

I’m wasting my potential and my mind.

So shake your head and grieve me;

I’ll play along,

But I don’t want your help when I decide.

(Sigh)

Chorus) I’m gonna help the penguins:

The Arctic needs love, too.

Maybe you just hate the thought of me breaking the rules.

I’m gonna help the penguins,

Don’t tell me what to do.

Thanks for your advice, but I’m not going back to school.

Bridge/Backup) Why are you askin’ me?

Why do you wanna know (huh)?

Why are you askin’ me?

Why do you wanna know (oh)?

Don’t feel sorry for me,

Don’t feel sorry, oh.

Just let me do my thing,

Let me do it, oh.


I hope you enjoyed it! If you did, hit the Like button, and/or leave a comment. If there’s a change you recommend, then suggest that in the comments, too. Have a wonderful day.

Lyrics copyright 2017. Original lyrics by KiWi.

One thought on “Education (Parody of “Attention” by Charlie Puth)

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